I’ve talked about turning fear into curiosity as one of my seven steps to optimal health and wellness. How do we do this when we are feeling stuck? When we feel like our world is tumbling and we are stuck in a rut? The current human condition is to feel like a victim or we might be the rescuer or the prosecutor. We get stuck in this negative triangle. It is called the Drama Triangle.
When we are ask ourselves, “Why me? Why does this always happen to me?” we fall into the victim role. We may identify our being with our illness or diagnosis. Or we may move over to the rescuer role, “I’m going to swoop in and fix this.” Some one else is hurting, I’m going to be the rescuer, which can make us feel good but ignore our own issues. Many healthcare providers identify with this role. Or we might take on the persecutor role, “What’s wrong with me?” It’s that internal negative voice full of automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) and self limiting beliefs that we bestow upon ourself.
How do we change this negative pattern? We can change this to a triangle that is full of personal development, growth and transformation. Imagine what your life can become by changing these dynamics! We can change from being the victim to becoming the creator. To be the creator of our destiny.
To turn that inner voice into the coach like the little train that said, “I think I can, I think I can”
Or turn the inner critic, the persecutor into the challenger. When you hear that voice saying, “Why am I always so dumb? Why am I always so sick?” (or whatever ANTs show up) ask a different question.
Like, “Am I always dumb, all the time? Is this really true? What would my life be life if I were smart or not sick (or healthy or thin and beautiful or whatever the goal) How would I feel?” Get into this future vision of yourself that you can keep in your mind, and be open to new possibilities. Then take small sustainable steps to get there. I’m taking on a challenger role by writing this blogpost. What will you create as a result of it?
This is the power of coaching. To have another person help you to co-create a new reality for yourself. Co-create a plan that serves you better. To look at the dis-ease you are feeling today as a lesson for where you don’t want to be; and as motivation to help you create a roadmap to where you want to be.
Food for thought. Carpe Diem.
Lisa
About Lisa Jackson, RN, CHC, RYT-500, AFMC
Lisa is an author, functional nutrition, and functional medicine trained health coach, yoga teacher, and retired Registered Nurse with the mission to “Inspire, Educate and Empower” individuals and corporations to achieve optimal health.
When she is not coaching, or speaking, you can find Lisa joyfully sharing Carpe Diem Dance or playing with her two grandchildren. She is the mother of four adult children and believes, “Optimal health should not be a secret.”